The Night Stalker

Didnt we almost have it all?

2012-02-14T12:29:00.000+08:00

Remember when we held on in the rain
The night we almost lost it
Once again we can take the night into tomorrow
Living on feelings
Touching you I feel it all again

[Chorus]
Didn't we almost have it all
When love was all we had worth giving?
The ride with you was worth the fall my friend
Loving you makes life worth living
Didn't we almost have it all
The night we held on till the morning
You know you'll never love that way again
Didn't we almost have it all

The way you used to touch me felt so fine
We kept our hearts together down the line
A moment in the soul can last forever
Comfort and keep us
Help me bring the feeling back again

[Chorus]

Didn't we have the best of times
When love was young and new?
Couldn't we reach inside and find
The world of me and you?
We'll never lose it again
Cause once you know what love is
You never let it end

[Chorus]

2012-02-09T18:52:00.001+08:00

I know she is totally not appreciative, even though I'm dog sitting for her. I have to cater to her timing and change my plans just so she can go for a massage.

I'm quite annoyed. But yet I still make excuses for her.

Stupid fool.

2012-02-05T21:47:00.001+08:00

What is it in you that always make me falter and waver?

Or maybe it's just me.

2012-01-31T13:41:00.001+08:00

We make such a good couple. <3

2012-01-30T22:32:00.001+08:00

Feeling fulfilled

2012-01-30T18:55:00.001+08:00

I miss the feeling of being fulfilled, contented.

There used to be a time way back when I used to feel like I had a purpose in life. I feel driven. Like what I do everyday WILL make a difference and I go home to loving arms and a warm embrace feeling so contented I could just die that very second without regrets.

I lost that feeling. I don't feel driven any more. I'm unmotivated and sluggish. Just going through each day for the sake of it.
I need to feel motivated again.

I need the spring in my steps and the wind through my hair.

2012-01-26T23:39:00.001+08:00

Even Malaysia reminds me of you. TSK!!

2012-01-23T18:32:00.001+08:00

Is it stupid to be still in love with you? CNY brings back so many memories of us.

2012-01-21T15:57:00.001+08:00

Dear Heart, She's using you. She won't treat you like that if she loves you. Remember that. Don't let her break you again.

2012-01-20T23:41:00.001+08:00

What am I still hoping for? SERIOUSLY. Ain't you just like anyone else?
Haven't I gotten my fingers burnt more than once? I should have learnt my lesson by now.

SILLY

Sudden bouts of missing you

2012-01-17T21:30:00.001+08:00

It's weird. I suddenly go into a sudden state of longing/missing you.
A song, a scent, seeing clothes that u will like to wear, places... Almost everything reminds me of you on some days and I suddenly remember you.

Your scent, the way you hug me to bed, I even miss your grouchiness sometimes.

I know I'm much happier now. But I guess after loving you so much for so many years, it's just hard to get rid of you.

You are like a shadow. You pop up sometimes when the sun is overhead and follow me around in darkness.

2010-06-06T14:43:00.002+08:00

I hope u don't feel to badly about this whole thing. It's not ur fault. I told you before, you are the sweetest person and gf one can ever have. I mean it. I need a breather. I might have jumped into this whole r/s thing too fast.

I'm not pushing u away. I don't wana hurt u further. I need to go through this alone ok?

2010-06-04T13:05:00.000+08:00

2010-06-03T14:40:00.002+08:00

Havent been blogging for a coupla days. Read something that i found really... true?

We always hear stuff like, "It's been 6 months and he hasn't said 'I love you' yet." As if that's supposed to really mean something. But the fact that you've been together for 6 months doesn't mean anything other than you've been at it for 6 months. It doesn't mean that you're any closer to love than you were 6 months ago.

Because, as with anything else in life, the passage of time doesn't mean that you've actually accomplished anything. You don't get an "A" in school or a promotion at work just for showing up every day for 6 months. You have to actually DO something. And it has to be something GOOD.

It's a lot like saying "practice makes perfect." They figure that if you've been doing it a lot, then you should have perfected it. But think back to when you were practicing your penmanship in the second grade. Now look at your handwriting today. Have you actually perfected your penmanship? Some of us still have fairly good penmanship -- and some of us don't.

Because practice does NOT make perfect. You have to actually practice the RIGHT things in the RIGHT way to get it RIGHT. You have to follow the right steps and you have to put your whole effort into it. That takes focus and dedication. But if you keep at it, then "muscle memory" takes over. Your body does it without having to think about it. Like breathing.

The problem is that "muscle memory" also applies to practicing the wrong thing the wrong way over and over again too. Your body doesn't know the difference. That's why a lot of people still have bad handwriting. It becomes a bad habit they can't break because they always had bad form and they kept practicing that bad form over and over again.

In other words, practice doesn't make perfect, it just makes it permanent.

So let's get real about 6-month pseudo-anniversaries. At 6 months, you don't actually LOVE each other. Sure, you think you do. But you don't really. That's why it's so damn hard for you to say, "I love you." And that's why you need your partner to say it so badly. Because you want your own feelings to be validated so you can call it "love" too.

People get so caught up in superficial romantic gestures that they forget the real work that has to be done in developing a real relationship. That's why they go overboard in celebrating 1-month, 2-month, and 6-month pseudo-anniversaries. At the same time, when their partner says, "I'm feeling very stressed (or unhappy, frustrated, depressed, etc.)," their first reaction is "What about me?" instead of "Is there anything I can do for you?" They can't even practice good customer service with the one customer they supposedly love.

So, if anything, you're "in" love with each other. Unfortunately, people always mistake being "in" love for real love. "In" love involves chemistry. You either have it or you don't. And if you don't have it, then no amount of time is going to change the fact that you don't have it. That's where "he's not that into you" comes in.

But even if you have chemistry, that's still not enough to make a relationship. Because real love requires time to develop. And a lot of work. You have to be secure enough as an individual to be able to set your "me"-centeredness aside and become more "us"-oriented. You have to value making peace more than you value your pride or your principles. "Doing the right thing" has to be more important to you than "being right."

You also hear people say stuff like, "I love you, but I'm not IN love with you." That's just BS. What they really mean is "I was IN love with you more than I actually LOVED you." The truth is that once the chemistry faded, there was nothing left to sustain the relationship. "In" love never blossomed into real "love."

In other words, there's no "love at first sight." That's "in" love. And there is no love at 6 months either. That's still "in" love. Real love needs to develop. And you have to actually DO something -- and it needs to be something GOOD.

So if you're making a big fuss about celebrating your 6-month pseudo-anniversary, then you're much too aware of what time it is to be actually doing anything of any real significance. It's like going to work. Some employees spend their time watching the clock all day to see when it's break time, lunch time, or quitting time. But a few dedicated workers spend their day actually doing their jobs. Because if you're focused on what you're supposed to be doing, then time should pass without being noticed.

In other words, if you're washing dishes, then you have to wash the dishes to WASH the dishes -- NOT to get it over with so you can go do something else. You need to be fully engaged in the task of washing the dishes. Like I said before, you have to actually practice doing the RIGHT things in the RIGHT way if you want to get it RIGHT.

And if you take care in doing what you're doing today, then tomorrow will take care of itself.

ok the more i read it... the more truth it holds.

2010-05-29T23:03:00.002+08:00

I sense ur unhappiness. I feel it through ur texts...

I can't figure out what the cause of it is. pms? Shitty working hours? ... Me?

Hrmm... I'm trying to figure out how to make u feel better coz it bothers me when u are unhappy. Don't push me away. Coz I wana be there for u.

2010-05-26T13:46:00.002+08:00

I'm super cranky today. There's all these angst in me that I need to let out. I guess the pressure is getting to me?
Why do I have to explain my actions to everybody? Seriously? Ain't this my life? It's my god damn relationship ain't it?
Stop asking me questions that I can't answer.

I wana smash stuff. Everything if I could.

Fuck

2010-05-22T15:01:00.002+08:00

I close my eyes and I see you. Smiling with that mischevious twinkle in your eye, like u have something hidden up your sleeve. The feeling of you kissing my forehead and running your fingers lightly over my nose, eyelids and lips.

Time seems to fly when I'm with u and we never seem to have enough time.
You make me happy. Like ridiculously happy... If this is our honeymoon period like people says, I never want this to end. If it does... It will be the most memorable times in my life.

I love my strawberry!

2010-05-21T22:29:00.002+08:00

I'm lying in bed missing u.
Is it even possible to miss someone so much? It sucks knowing that u will only knock off at 3am. Coz I know, by the time u get back I will be asleep. I'm so not used to this.

I miss u badly.

2010-05-21T09:29:00.002+08:00

Its the beginning of a new day and already as im typing this, thoughts of u fill my head...

Are your dreams filled with me now? Im so wishing i can be beside you, snuggled in each other's arms sleeping soundly. I miss being awakened by ur soft kisses on my forehead. Sighs

I think i will miss u like crazy for the next few days.

*Darling, i can tell u honestly, im not gg to leave u cz im so madly in love with u... Yes i may not show u that im jealous and all, but that doesnt mean i love u any less... i promise u, i will and always love u.*

I was too sleepy to actually read this and appreciate last night. Now i have this warm fuzzy feeling in my chest. *beams*

Such a sweet strawberry.

2010-05-20T12:11:00.001+08:00

I never did like strawberries.

Expect for a particular one. So very sweet and all mine!
*grins*

2010-05-19T15:35:00.002+08:00

Who would have thought i would be working in a quaint lil shop house as a admin/copy writer?
I always seen myself in the events industry or something exciting and challenging. But here i am juicing my brains dry to come with with words to make an article flow. So my love of the english language comes in handy here?

Now im seeing letters of the alphabet swim around in front of my eyes.

This month has been pretty eventful... New love, new job BUT super broke. I might just start peeling wallpaper off walls and chewing on them.

*im lucky to have you*

2010-05-19T15:24:00.001+08:00

Semd someone to love me,
I need two resting arms,
to keep me safe from harm...
in the pouring rain.

IMY.

2010-04-08T17:30:00.001+08:00

什么都不要懂只想继续做梦
害怕醒来以后握不住你的手
如果同一秒钟你也想起了我
心只要能微微颤抖就已足够

爱上你不需要理由你到底懂不懂
可是怀念竟比失去还要更难受
噢~爱让我想起你的时候泪禁不住滑落
或许我永远都看不透

爱上你不需要理由你到底懂不懂
伤心快乐在回忆中反复的交错
噢~爱让我想起你的时候泪禁不住滑落
可惜你永远都不会懂

放心我还会好好的过

2010-03-27T01:19:00.001+08:00

It's 1.20am. I can't sleep. Sighs. Relationships suck!!

2010-03-25T00:03:00.002+08:00

Surprisingly everything else doesn't hurt except my head. Hurts like hell. U should have seen my 'friend' face when she told Ian everything. Like very shiok like that. Well this whole thing is my fault so u don't keep telling me sorry. I took some pills... Supposed to make me sleep dunno if it works.

My head really hurts. Sigh

2010-03-24T16:36:00.000+08:00

Did I tell u I missed u today? Well I miss u.

2010-03-24T14:20:00.000+08:00

I am seriously bored at home. Sigh

Think happy thoughts happy thoughts!!

2010-03-23T23:55:00.002+08:00

We are the world...
We are the children.
We are the ones to make a better day
so let's start giving.

I'm addicted to this mv. Dunno y.

3 things that made me smile today,
1. Joji!
2. Ying's fat ass
3. A backstreet boys song on the radio

2010-03-23T18:24:00.002+08:00

I guess we have said all that's been needed to say, there's nothing much left.
Maybe things will be different next time, maybe we won't even talk anymore.

Thanks for talking to me today anyway... I needed it :)

I will still miss u and I believe a part of u still lives in me.

I have to learn to forget u.

2010-03-23T11:46:00.002+08:00

hey我真的好想你
现在窗外面又开始下着雨
眼睛干干的有想哭的心情
不知道你现在到底在哪里

hey我真的好想你
太多的情绪没适当的表情
最想说的话我应该从何说起
你是否也像我一样在想你

如果没有你
没有过去我不会有伤心
但是有如果还是要爱你
如果没有你
我在哪里又有什么可惜
反正一切来不及
反正没有了自已

hey我真的好想你
不知道你现在到底在哪里
你是否也像我一样在想你

On repeat mode :( cant have happy thoughts now. see... i went to read ur blog again. kill me can? i think i can memorize ur entry liao.

i dont block u, i will hurt myself, hurt u. i block u, i also hurt u. How?

u dont even talk to me. u talk to me la... then i unblock u. humph.

UNBLOCK U on msn liao la. u not even online, when u are online u also dont talk to me, KNS right.

Fyi, the first thing that made me smile today is i bought 2 pairs of shoes with the last $20 i have. So now im bloody broke but i have two pairs of shoes. :)

Now im not smiling anymore.

2010-03-23T10:56:00.002+08:00

if only there is a way to block someone from my thoughts, my memories, basically everything. then it would be perfect! ok i really need to stop thinking bout u.focus on happier things.

u are happier now. i must be happy too!

2010-03-23T10:43:00.002+08:00

its a rainy rainy morning... dark, wet and gloomy. didnt wana wake up today. if only i can sleep and sleep and sleep.told myself not to read ur blog. not to read ur blog. in the end still read. stupid stupid me. i unblocked u from msn last night, im blocking u again now. sorry.

i refuse to cry anymore. not at work, not on the bus, not at home. its time for me to build up my walls. Thicker and stronger this time.

I wonder how i would react if i saw u on the streets. U and ur gf. I hate her already.

i still need to pass u money every month for my hp bill. theres no need for u to pay for it anymore. Friends have been disappearing from my life in a span of weeks, u are one of them. I miss u the most.

I have more things to accomplish today,
1) Not to look at ur blog
2) Not to look at ur FB
3) Not to think about u
4) Be happy
5) Focus on work

I already failed at number 1. sigh

2010-03-23T01:10:00.002+08:00

FreakiNg can't sleep... Gahhhh finished half a pack of my cigs in a few hours. Can lose weight if I smoke more right? Saw u online earlier... Did u notice me? Helloo... Byebye. Watching the show that u like to watch. The Harlem one.

Sighs

2010-03-22T22:43:00.002+08:00

Head hurts... Been feeling too much emotions lately and I'm super hungry. I crave for chicken wings but it's no fun eating alone. Sigh it's hard for us to be friends hor? I'm sorry I hurt u. I'm sorry

2010-03-22T12:25:00.000+08:00

3 things to accomplish today,

1) not look at ur fb
2) not think of u
3) be happy

2010-03-22T01:40:00.002+08:00

Remember how we used tobe so in love? Like nothing could ever go wrong? I believed that as long as u were around I would be ok. I always wondered how it all changed. To tell u the truth, I miss those days... Though u neglected me for work but I miss the feeling of being happily in love.

I understand y u hate me. Coz I hate myself too... I really think I'll regret losing u. But I remind myself everyday, I chose this. I MUST be happy coz I chose this. No looking back.

Till I really forget u, I'll be blogging coz noone reads my blog anymore so it's kinda safe. I miss u fei. Will u tell me that everything will be alright once again?

2010-03-22T00:55:00.002+08:00

Resisted the urge to look at ur fb. Suceeded. Lying on the bed waiting for sleep to come.

I hid in the shower to cry today. Good long cry and I felt better. even she could feel that I was acting weird. She couldn't figure out why though.

I need to give u money for my hp bill... I'm still wondering how to pass it to u.

Are u happier without me?

2010-03-21T14:27:00.002+08:00

Dreamt of u last night. Can't remember what it was though. This is the choice I made the road that I chose so I should be happy right?
Been feeling very emo lately. Anything can and will trigger a flood of tears. Bad tummy ache too almost everyday... :p how have u been these few days? How's work? Geok is getting married on the 30th of Jan. I have to pick gowns for both Joanne and geok's wedding. I really wish u could be there to choose dresses with me.

I need to stop thinking bout u.... FOCUS focus focus!!

3 tasks to accomplish today.
1) stop thinking bout u
2) stop checking out ur fb
3) stop thinking bout u

2010-03-20T19:14:00.001+08:00

Though i bocked u on my FB, my other FB account still has u in it. I saw ur pictures... u and her. I guess u both slept together already? U look very happy. Y do i feel this hugeass twinge of jealousy?

U are a very good gf. The best gf i've had.

Oh god i miss u.

2009-04-17T11:42:00.000+08:00

Little piggy I miss u lots..u r slping so soundly now..hope u r dreaming of mi..I miss u lots.. -0510-

2009-04-16T15:22:00.001+08:00

I miss my little princess..baby I think u must be sleeping very soundly now. Sweet dreams wor. One last thing...I love you!!! - 0510 -

2009-04-15T01:22:00.000+08:00

I m invading the little world of yr's..

Looking at you, just makes me smile..

Your kisses n hugs just warm me up..

I love you

- 0510 -

2008-12-09T22:44:00.002+08:00

Sprained my ankle today.. =(
No i was not wearing one of my super high killer heels, but a short one.
And yet i sprained my ankle.
So irritating.

Its christmas time soon... I like Christmas.
Everyone is especially nice and forgiving and loving.

Its one time in a year where old friends meet up/remember each other.
Who have i not contacted in the past year?
Hrmm.....

2008-11-19T22:54:00.001+08:00

I just read some ignorant girls' blog.

*Smirks*

It just made my day. LOL

Now, this blog entry IS REFERRING TO YOU!

2008-11-18T00:09:00.001+08:00

Forgot to add... i detest people talking behind me back. Come to me straight to my face if you dare.

2008-11-17T23:47:00.002+08:00

i just cant stand it when people cry crocodile tears.
Try to gain sympathy from the people around them. *GAG*

Sigh some people just dont get it. I have a million and one thing to say... and i have heard and seen a million and one things.

BUT. wth... poor lil innocent one... awww
am i making you feel bad? all hurt and torn inside? Upset maybe??
AWwwww...

YOU BLOODY DESERVE IT! AND I ENJOY BEING A BITCH.

I treasure friendships... i really do. It's not easy finding a really good friend. And i did not say i was giving it up. I just dont want to BITCH SLAP SOME PEOPLE.I have a low low tolerance level. seriously.

I cant stand people painting looking at the world with rose tinted lenses.
I cant stand it when peole tell me one thing and do another.
I cant stand it when people paint a rosy picture just to tell everyone how happy and blessed they are. When its actually the opposite.

Is my bitchy side showing? Opps... i forgot to cover it up.

2008-11-12T21:51:00.001+08:00

"It has been said, ‘time heals all wounds.’ I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone."

2008-10-27T00:13:00.002+08:00

Been meaning to blog but am too lazy/tired to.

FInally i can sit back, put my feet up and rest. Been OT ing and meeting deadlines like crazy. Parents are out of town, bro is confined in camp and i have the whooooollllleeeee house to myself. Heaven. Been having a VCD marathon and eating all kinds of junk food.

I wana go fishing, swimming and golfing. Next weekend?

oh... and a shopping spree? I want ankle boots!!!!!!!!!

*I really enjoy spending time with you. I love you.

2008-10-05T18:40:00.002+08:00

Its my baby's birthday today...

Whee~~

Got 3 presents for her, i gave her two already. Will give her the last one when i'm done. *Beams*
She got drunk silly last night and made a spectacle of herself. But its all in good fun. Now am at her place, her mother is cooking a darn good spread for dinner tonight. oh ya oh ya..... ZHANG HUI MEI's concert is bloody darn good. I so totally love her. sighs

Anyways....

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY DARLING!!!
I love u. Fats and all. LOL.

2008-09-30T01:14:00.003+08:00

Happy Birthday to me!!

Yes yes.. i'm 21 now. So happy to be finally of adult age. Sigh now i can wach RA movies and i am finally legal to do almost anthing.

*This is the result of self denial*

Anyways, my baby surprised me at vivo yesterday. With the help of Eeling, Edwin & Meiqi. The whole hush hush affair that lasted the whole day. Ended with light sticks showing "Happy Birthday" on the platform in PUBLIC on the balcony of vivo. Goodness... so pretty and a very darn good chocolate cake & flowers.

Headed to St James with some ass shaking head pounding time. Drowned a whole shitload of shots, a lot of horrible johnnie walker and my virgin flaming lambogini. Goodness... i managed to stay sober till i safely got my ass and my baby's ass home. I crashed. Had a major supremely pounding hangover.

Woke up in the noon to go for a huge ass interview 3 freaking hours!! And after interviewing with practically everybody, they offered me the job on the spot!! Coolness lar... World Gourmet Summit here i come. Wheee......
Drinking on Sat again, coz its my baby's birthday. Have a surprise planned for her. Hope it turns out good. =)

Daily Conversations

2008-09-18T14:03:00.002+08:00

Me: *yawn* Morning darling...
Her: Hello... you wake up already?
Me: Hm... You busy?
Her: Yeah... Kinda. What are you going to do today?
Me: Erm...... Miss you lor.
Her: *Laughs* The whole day?
Me: YES!
Her: *Laughs*

I am missing her.

2008-08-15T15:23:00.003+08:00

I'm leaving on a jet plane tomorrow morning. Its kinda like a holiday though we are going there for a totally different purpose. =p

NO MORE MORBID THOUGHTS

Coz everything will turn out totally fine. Promised a certain Miss Bai that i will come back on time and in one piece. *I buy mangos for you?*

So... do not worry. And the major problem i had yesterday... is settled. =) Thank goodness. Thanks for all your offerings of help and consoling words.

Esp: Miss Bai Meiqi

Thank you.

This the importance of having good friends around you. No matter how down or desolate a situation may seem. Its not that bad when you have good friends around you.

Must miss me people!!!

2008-08-14T16:00:00.001+08:00

I wana......

I wana....... i wana...........

curl myself up into a ball and hide into a small dark hole and never come out.

2008-08-12T19:23:00.002+08:00

Lyrics:

Aku yang lemah tanpamu
(I am weak without you)
Aku yang rentan karena
(I am vulnerable because of)
Cinta yang tlah hilang darimu
(The love which was lost from you)
Yang mampu menyanjungku
(That was able to flatter me)

Selama mata terbuka
(As long as my eyes are open)
Sampai jantung tak berdetak
(Even until my heart stops beating)
Selama itu pun
(It's as far as that will)
Aku mampu untuk mengenangmu
(I try to make you happy)

Darimu...
(From you)
Kutemukan hidupku
(Have I seen my life)
Bagiku...
(For me)
Kau lah cinta sejati
(You are my one true love)

Ooh...
(Ooh...)

CHORUS:

Bila yang tertulis untukku
(If what was written for me)
Adalah yang terbaik untukmu
(Is the best for you)
Kan kujadikan kau kenangan
(Then will I remember you as)
Yang terindah dalam hidupku
(My most beautiful memory in my life)

Namun takkan mudah bagiku
(It won't be easy for me)
Meninggalkan jejak hidupku
(To leave these footsteps in my life)
Yang tlah terukir abadi
(They were engraved permanently)
Sebagai kenangan yang terindah
(As the most beautiful memories in my life)

2008-08-11T14:37:00.002+08:00

Its been a pretty much wonderful national day weekend for me.
Went to the F.I.R concert on the 8th with my darling, meiqi and peishi. Faye was hot hot hot and ah xin was hotter!! *drools*

On national day itself, went down to tiong bahru to slack and wait for her to knock off. But Amelia, Yanne, Meiqi, my darling and me had a very last min meeting.
I know it was very weird and uncomfortable for meiqi at first can see your very shy scared face!! LOL.
But it turned out very well, qiqi drove us to labrador park to walk and we had fun talking, laughing while watching ppl catch sotong. Then we went up to Mount Faber just coz we wanted to catch people in THE act.

Btw qiqi, yanne says she looks matured now bcoz she was not wearing makeup and blusher! Not because she is older. I STILL LOOK 21 HOR....
and
Amelia says, that day no foundation or else i'll will look prettier. I'm STILL PRETTY HOR!!

2008-08-07T14:42:00.002+08:00

I just hung up the phone after talking to a "best friend" of mine. There is a " in the best friend simply because i really really am so irritated and disappointed in her and how much she knows about me. I have known her for almost 10 years been through relationships ups and downs and i expect her to know me inside out.

Or maybe she changed... or i changed... i dunno

I'm going to manila over the weekend after national day, i was talking to her about it. She said, "I just wonder, what are you going to do there in Manila?"
I said, "Loads! Theres shopping, sight seeing... Historical landmarks. I wana go see the churches."
She said, "Dun bluff lar. So unlike you. You just shop."

I was quite irritated already. So we hung up. After a min, she called again,
She said, " I just wana say, dont u think its very ironic of you to visit churches when your main purpose there is to take a life?"

I was soooo irritated after that. Sometimes i do think its a right move not to call her nor pick up her calls. I am not what you think i am and i might be a deeper person than you think i am.
At least i am not a materialistic bimbotic who tries so hard to be someone else.

I AM IRRITATED.

2008-08-07T10:50:00.002+08:00

Do you know how irritating it is to be stuck with the sound of drilling? The monotone draggy sound of the drill just irks me and puts me to sleep. Like being stuck in the office is not bad enough. Damn. I wana scream....

I'm going to Manila next weekend. Will be back on monday... i just told KM i needed urgent leave for family matters. As it will fall on a sunday i need someone to replace mua. Crossing my fingers and hope he doesnt nag at me. Blechzz.

Going F.I.R concert tml. Whoo hoo...

Thats it i'm going to murder the construction worker who is drilling. The noise is drowning out my train of thought. Grrr.....

2008-08-05T10:49:00.002+08:00

I'm sitting at my desk falling asleep.... taking the chance to eat snake coz i soooo do not have the energy to work now. ZZzzzz... I have this super duper chocolate craving now. Chocolates anyone? zzzz...

2008-07-30T14:23:00.002+08:00

* Warning! Long post ahead.*

Its been a very long and tiring 2 days that feel like an eternity.
Mentally, emotionally and physically draining.
damn...

I'm in such a mix of emotions i'm lacking of words in the dictionary to describe the feeling.
This is a damn bloody good example of why i bloody am lesbian. Now i thank the heavens that i am different and i do not have a slimmest slightest chance to get pregnant.

It is soooo drama its like a scene from some cheesy daytime soap people watch.

Started when my bro's gf got sent back to malaysia when she got fired and her WP expired. So she was unable to come back to SG for a couple of weeks and my bloody itchy brother decides that she is a pain in his ass and wants to dump her.
She appeared at my house on Monday and let herself into my house and took MY MOTHER'S FAV chopper and put it in my bro's room. My maid saw and called my mother who in turn called my bro. So both my mum and my bro rushed back to meet the gf. Which lead to an arguement between my bro and her. In the midst of the quarrel she whipped out the chopper and threatened to slash her wrists. My brother wrestled with her while my mother tried to take the chopper away.
When the chopper was safely removed the was in tears and begged my mother to tell my brother not to leave her and blah blah... my hot headed brother got pissed again.
She locked herself up in the room, broke his very expensive precious perfume bottle and tried to slit her throat while my brother kicked the door down and my mother called my dad and then called the police.
The police came, bundled her and took her away.

All this happened while i was at work. Damn damn damn. anyways....

We changed the padlock worried that the might come back and murder all of us in the middle of the night. But she came back... lurking around in the void deck. My brother, me and Gary went down to talk to her. Luckily one of my bro's friend is with her.
She showed us her reports, she claims my brother assulted her. NEVERMIND.... the biggest blow is when we saw she was 3 months pregnant. I got so speechless all i could do was sit there and gasp for breath. (this is not the first time my bro got a girl pregnant. he now has a 1 year old daughter somewhere in Singapore) So i asked her what she wants. She wants my bro to marry her and she wants to keep the baby. But hellooo... my bro is only 19 in NS earning like 400 a month? She is jobless with no home. I told her no way. She has to either abort or give the baby away. Cannot get married. But i quote her "I will not let him go so easily." "He has to marry me or i will charge him for rape/molest."
Gary woke my mother up and we all were debating till 4am in the morning.
Next day woke up at 10 to bring her to KK hospital and a gyne to book for abortion.
The doc scanned her tummy and when i say the baby, it brought tears to my eyes. Coz it waved at me. I could see its tiny head, chest, heart and hands.Sigh. But outcome was that she cannot abort in SG coz no WP. So now the situation is pending.

Some people want babies but no matter how they try, no babies, my bloody brother just want sex pop 2 babies out. 1 in a year. Stupid asshole. My heart goes out to his gf and the baby. I want babies too!!

This is a lesson learnt. WEAR CONDOMS!

*Thank goodness i'm lesbian.* =p

2008-07-23T16:16:00.002+08:00

I've decided to sweep off the cobwebs and mildew thats been growing on the page. Yes yes... Not blogged for a long time. =p

I'm at work waiting for time to pass before i can go. Got a BBQ to attend to later and i'm full of excitment. I miss BBQed chix wings and all the unhealthy oily greasy food. So much for the decision to stay healthy.
Met up with my bunch of siao char bohs (crazy girls) yesterday. Was Ames's 24th birthday. Since Dempsey was the IT and happening place to see and be seen in, we headed there for dinner. Made reservations at PS cafe. In attendance was, Eve, Joanne/Aimei, Geok yan/Dyanne, Amelia/Ames, Elina and Me. Digress... its wierd that peopla wana name themselves just to make yourself sound nicer. I am sooo not used to calling Aimei, Joanne when i have been calling her Aimei for the past ten years. WTH...
Back to topic. Dinner was ok. Had some creamy fish thing that made me totally nausaous halfway through the meal. Too creamy. *gag* But amelia's flamed prawn spag was damn good. Eve had ribs, geok had some chix spag, elina had veal tenderloin with was damn good too!! Desserts on the other hand was fantastic. The Choco pudding was ORGASMIC!! You will feel as if you just died and gone to chocolate heaven. Imagine this. A spongy dark chocolate sponge cake thingy sitting in a dish of hot chocolate sauce thats not too sweet, with a tinge of bitterness and a tang of brandy. Complete with some sour prunes and a frozen ball of vanilla ice cream. Damn.
Total damage, $362.00. Totally fitting the image of Dempsey huh. But we all had fun, loads of catching up and hysterical laughter.
These are the people that never fail to put a smile on my face.

Will be my birthday next. And my big ass darling is gona plan something for me. I wonder...
Been staying over at each other's places lately. Her mum's a good cook so i've been stuffing my face.

My huge ass + Her huge ass = COMPATIBLE!!

*grins*

2008-07-02T18:17:00.001+08:00

Heart of the Matter - India.Arie

I got the call today, I didn't wanna hear
But I knew that it would come
An old true friend of ours was talkin' on the phone
She said you found someone
And I thought of all the bad luck,
And all the struggles we went through
How I lost me and you lost you
What are these voices outside love's open door
Make us throw off our contentment
And beg for something more?

I've been learning to live without you now
But I miss you sometimes
The more I know, the less I understand
All the things I thought I knew, I'm learning them again
I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

These times are so uncertain
There's a yearning undefined
And people filled with rage
We all need a little tenderness
How can love survive in such a graceless age
And the trust and self-assurance that lead to happiness
They're the very things we kill, I guess
Pride and competition cannot fill these empty arms
And the work they put between us,
You know it doesn't keep us warm

All the people in your life who've come and gone
They let you down, you know they hurt your pride
Better put it all behind you; cause life goes on
You keep carrin' that anger, it'll eat you up inside

I wanna be happily everafter
And my heart is so shattered
But I know it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
Because the flesh will get weak
And the ashes will scatter
So I'm thinkin' about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if you don't love me anymore
Even if you don't love me anymore

2008-06-30T16:52:00.002+08:00

Now i am addicited to this song. Damn y do songs have to be so full of emotions and feelings?

你曾经说我走以后
希望还有联络
能够聆听彼此的苦乐

2008-06-26T14:58:00.000+08:00

就算我们之间有什么问题
依然想念着你
虽然被放弃虽然我愿意
就算我们之间有什么难题
黑夜我还想着你
心碎人孤寂虽然我愿意

2008-06-21T10:04:00.002+08:00

The past few days have been such long and draggy days. Been busy consoling and comforting one of my best friends. Her 'husband to be' cruelly dumped her and hurt her feelings, only to come running back and doing it all over again. Doesnt that sound all so familiar? Seeing her in that broken/half dead state reminds me of the past.

She is back with him now btw. Just hope things does not repeat or i'll rip his ass into half.

Love makes u blind, stupid, stubborn, rash and basically fucks up your whole life. Knowing that, why do we still get so hooked to the idea of falling head over heels and so madly in love??

Pink pink pink

2008-06-16T13:37:00.002+08:00

I'm blogging from work. Coz i am bored!! Whats new huh. Almost everyone else went out for lunch and i am on a diet. Been staring at the screen for half the morning coz i got practically nothing to do. Snore.

I got a driving lesson tonight!! Very super happy coz I have been trying to book lessons the last whole week but none! Irritating. I am super desperate to get my licence and i'll kill anyone bloody person who stands in my way. I want my carrrr!!! Though technically its not mine but company's property, but i'm driving it!! So its kinda mine. wahahaha.... okok i know i sound teeny bit mad.

Did i tell you i'm in love with Moscato(white wine) and cheese? I got a huge craving for it.

I changed my office comp's template to pink out of boredom. So now i have pink windows... wheeeeeee..............

2008-06-14T05:59:00.002+08:00

I pray you'll be our eyes
And watch us where we go
and help us to be wise. in times when we dont know
let this be our prayer
when we lose our way...
Lead us to a place, guide us with ur grace
to a place where we'll be safe.

We ask that life be kind
and watch us from above
We hope each soul will find
another soul to love

Let this be our prayer, just like every child

Ramblings in the dead of the night

2008-06-14T05:37:00.003+08:00

As you can tell, i've not updated in a super duper long time. I guess i have too many thoughts, feelings that i do not really know how to actually put them into words. Many changes, stuff happening everyday that its too long to post.

Its almost 6am and i'm still goldfish eyed awake. damn. its irritating wanting to sleep and trying to but you cant. Been sleepless lately. What do people do in the middle of the night when you are lying in ur bed, venurable, alone with your thoughts and emotions? I dont know bout you, but i definately feel an extra rush of emotions in the dead of the night. Simple things like listening to class 95 and a familiar song comes on, which can bring you an onset of many different feelings.

Do you get the feeling that something is missing in you/your life? Even though you are happy and contented with ur life now? You feel an immense sadness deep in you sometimes and know that somethings missing even though you dont know what?

Gaze upon the stars at night. See a little piece of Heaven itself.

2008-05-15T09:53:00.002+08:00

I'm here to sneak a blog in while at work. Its 10am and i am already falling asleep. I miss thailand... I went there with 1 small bag, and came back with 2! hee... bought 6 pairs of shoes, a mountain of clothes and another mountain of bags. Shiookk!

Just started work and i already have 2 huge projects on hand with the deadlines in July. And if i miss the deadlines, i'm dead. So i forsee loads of OT and sleepless nights with an overload of coffee. Its been meetings, reading documents, editing books, meetings, meeting deadlines. Endless cycle. But been meeting her for dinner and a drink after work everyday. =) I enjoy her company all the time.

Boss is sick and cranky so i gotta go... blechz

2008-05-01T00:22:00.002+08:00

Its my short lil holiday these few days...
Been doing things and going to places that we usually have no time nor the mood to go to. Slacked around at home, went to the zoo and seen a couple of monkeys that resembles my baby. *sniggers* Today we went in to JB and wanted to just walk around and eat. BUT... we ended up shopping. =)she is like a happy lil kid now. Will be going to bangkok on sunday and i have decided to.......... buy 4 huge luggage bags full of clothes, shoes and accessories. Yum!!

*I am really enjoying my time with you. I will cherish each and every min as i will be too busy in the future. I love you.*

2008-04-24T17:24:00.002+08:00

I've always been in love with the power and beauty of words. It can cut deeper than a knife and leave you scars nobody can see. Or leave you amazed and breathless with the beauty and wonderment of it all. I've just read a short description of a couple of phones that i found very inspiring. 'state of the art. Chic, confident and assuredly tasteful. Just like you. Refined, mysterious and seductively charming. You are your own person. Your own style. It's all intuitive so trust yourself.' 'reflecting the iridescence of life' i love these few lines. Will be starting my new job very very soon. Mixed emotions of fear and excitement. Crossing my fingers.

2008-04-21T13:41:00.002+08:00

I'm in a holiday mood now. Will be leaving for thailand in 2 weeks time and in between that i have a week to slack and grow fungus at home before i embark on a new adventure. Thus i'm just sitting and staring at the people passing my watching the world go by while just counting my mins and seconds before i get out of this place. And i just revamped my room! Totally new furniture and new layout. I'm so in love with it now. Thinking of adding a small coffee table and a small sofa. If possible i would love to rot in my room the whole day! Whee...

2008-04-02T01:40:00.003+08:00

I havent been blogging for like a super long time. Either i'm too tired after work or i just cant be bothered to blog. Will be finally going on a holiday with my baby. After a long long time. *grin* been busy with work lately.. and whatever spare time it with her or pampering myself. Couldnt ask for more now... she fulfills my every whim and fancy even my wierd sudden cravings for food. She's just amazing.
example when i called her at work telling her i want to eat apples, she bought me this huge big ass apple. I spent half an hour munching on it.

Big big apple

A cake she bought me after a major fight. She claims it looks like her. lol

A little note that came with the cake.

My gorgeous new heels that is just to die for. She bought it after i commented i loved it.

Though we have our ups and downs and our arguing and fighting, you are always the one to put the smile back on my face. I thank my lucky stars to have you around. =)

2008-03-20T01:07:00.001+08:00

你最近还好吗
是不是也在思念褃挣扎
你说会记得我还记得吗
你最近还好吗
忙碌吗累吗心还会痛吗
如果真不得已忘了我
快向快乐出发

someone said this song reminded her of me.

I like this song... curtrent fav. Nice lyrics.

2008-03-19T23:00:00.000+08:00

I'm sitting at the bus stop waiting for my baby to meet me for dinner. I'm sitting here in fear as there are like a whole shitload of cockroaches running around!! Damn it's like a cockroach field day man. Super gross! An unsuspecting one ran under this guy's feet and it died with a loud pop! Gross!! She's here finally. Away from the cockroach party.... Finally.

2008-03-16T11:46:00.002+08:00

we started out walking on two totally different paths. As we walked along the long winding road, our paths crossed. And as the road gradually merged, we walked along, together at the same pace. Chatting and laughing as our steps matched each other. Maybe there was a pebble in my shoe, or maybe i paused to catch my breathe, i looked up and she was walking ahead and i was lagging behind her. No matter how i tried to increase my pace, she was still ahead of me. Our steps no longer match each other and our paces are drifting further and further apart. I'm sitting on a boulder on the side of the road waiting for her to look back and realise i'm lagging behind and hopefully our steps will match again.

2008-03-09T16:29:00.000+08:00

I'm stuck at work and i'm bored. Such a lazy sunday and full of wierd people asking wierd questions. I want to be out shopping, or in bed with my baby. Sleep the day away. (as i'm trying to blog, i have customers in front of me asking me stupid questions so pardon me if i sound abit insane.) sigh. I'm dreaming about Guess's heels. I'm currently in love with them. I just purchased a pair and now, i cant bear to wear them because they are just so beautiful!! The satin cloth under my feet, the sleek thin long heels, the shiny trimmings.... Goodness. Give me a moment to orgas while i fantasize about them... Hee. I'm sitting in the shop, watching the rain drops fall on the pavement, people dodging the rain, a colourful array of umbrellas, the smell of the rain.............. I'm seriously falling asleep.

2008-02-18T19:02:00.002+08:00

I think i'm PMSing

..............................
............................
.........................
..................

the whole world is not picking up the phone

.........................
....................
...........
...
.

sighs

2008-02-18T18:54:00.002+08:00

I'm fuming and brooding away alone in the shop while everybody is out somewhere getting ready for the dinner... while here i am alone. Sighs i feel pathetically miserable... and she cant do anything... she can never do anything about anything. sighs...

I cant even go pee coz its heavy to lift up the damn gates. argh... today's not a good day. So not good.

Elina called this afternoon sounding sheepish and guilty, she said, " i think i got myself into hot soup." she slept with some other slut behind her gf's back and she expects me to console her and make her feel better. HAH! I naturally got pissed and screwed her. And all that crap about loving her gf and no one else but her. Bullshit. And to think after all the shit she put me through she is expecting me to console her when she cheats on her gf yet again?? Hell no.

The world's fucked. Life's fucked. Makes me doubt myself and the people around me sometimes.

I'm bored.... seriously... they are taking ages to come get me. I'm cold and hungry and bored...........................................................................

2008-02-09T14:03:00.000+08:00

Havent been blogging for quite sometime. Its the chinese new year already. In a blink of an eye, its been a year. How fast time flies. Can you remember what you were doing in the exact same time last year? I can.

Having a party over at my place in the evening, sigh so much stuff to do and i miss my baby. I dont know why but i just cant seem to get enough of her. Am going back to work again tommrrow. Bummer. Cant stand going back to that place and seeing the people there. sighs......

Memories

2008-01-27T23:51:00.000+08:00

You never realize how much you love someone until they're gone. You never realize that, yes, once their love surrounded you but now, what do you have?
Memories… Why does love hurt so much, when it's supposed to be a good thing? Why do we dwell on the past, when the future is what matters? It's something that, yeah, I guess can't be helped but, maybe it's harder for you then it is for someone else. Faint smells of cologne, a song on the radio, a movie, or a single word, these are things that bring back those memories. But you can't hide from these things, because, they're there and no matter how hard you try to, they'll always be there. Even when you have moved on to the future and things don't trigger the memories as much as before, they still do.
You can't forget someone you've loved, you may want to, but you can't. Love cannot be forgotten, no matter how hard we try, and how much we think it will ease the pain, it will always be there, forever.
I wanted a perfect ending, now I've learned the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next...

2008-01-27T23:40:00.000+08:00

I'm very very tired. No matter how much i sleep or rest, it never seems to be enough. Been growing fat too. sighs. Been sick for a week now, i'm drained. physically and mentally.

Won a brand new laptop at my company's Dinner and dance causing alot of stares and gossip. Office politics at its peak again. Am pretty happy with it. Though is very extra sensitive and i dont like windows vista. But what the hell. Its a laptop. Loads of stuff to do before the new year.

I need a break. I want to sleep and sleep and sleep... hopefully not to wake up anytime soon.

2008-01-21T18:52:00.000+08:00

woah... i didnt realise i had a mini war going on in my tagboard. I'm glad i look exotic. Dont you think so? Some people are just too free and like to create some excitment. =p

2008-01-18T14:23:00.000+08:00

My baby is in thailand now. Goodness its amazing how much i miss her. Every time i hear a song, smell her perfume, wait for the bus.... i think of her. Absence certainly makes the heart grow fonder. I now accutely realise how much she is involved in my daily life and how she just completes and fills my day.

She bought loads of stuff for me. Smiles. I cant wait for our little trip together. Gosh i miss her. sighs

2007-12-26T00:53:00.000+08:00

She said each time she saw me, i grew prettier. But i dont think so. I think its because she loves me so thats y i grew prettier. Sharing my daily life with her is just pure contentment. All the little things like having breakfast together in the mornings and supper in the night and all the little messages in between just helps to get me through a hard day at work. And i know that because of me, she'll try to make the world stop revolving, pluck the stars down from the skies just because i said they look pretty. Cheer me up endlessly when i am sad and fume and shake her fist at those that dare to trample on my toes.
Its because of all these little things that makes me have a little smile just before i drop off to dreamland, and not the diamond ring on my finger nor the endless number of roses nor the fancy handphones that i have got. I would gladly trade them for something that would make her smile always and stop the pain and anguish of her missing her dog.
I'm blessed. I'm lucky to have found her. =)

2007-12-26T00:33:00.000+08:00

Yet another christmas has come and gone... in a flash there goes another year. I always thought of christmas as a very special day. Of all seasons, i love the christmas season the most. When i was younger, i used to be able to smell the christmas season in the air. Sense the magic and the wonderment as i gaze awe struck at all the glittering lights dancing on the streets of town. You can smell the love and everyone is particularly nice and friendly. But sadly, as i grew older... i could no longer smell nor sense the love and magic in the air. The lights became just mere lights. Soon i realised i was the only one trying to stir up the magic of christmas while the others just shrugged it off a, " its just another day. why do you want to join the mad house on the streets?" Is it just me who senses the magic in the air? And who realises that the lights are not just mere lights? What happened to the season of giving and love? Or have we just outgrew the romance and childish dreams??

But i digress....

Been feeling nostalgic as i realised that yet another year have slipped out of my grasp. In a year, i got my heartbroken, went in and out of depression, died a little, changed my wardrobe, got a new pet, made new friends and enemies, fell in love, got a new job and all these are just the major changes. But yet as i try hard to remember what i have done in the past year that i found was most meaningful, i couldnt come up with anything. So tell me...what have you done in the past year that was most meaningful? Something that totally made a difference? Or are we too wrapped up in the rat race that we are blinded by the hidden delights.

2007-12-21T23:49:00.000+08:00

I'm soo soo very tired. sigh. Been too tired to blog, hang out with friends.... blah blah. Basially life has been like a standstill. work work and more work. I feel lifeless. I miss going fishing, swimming, eating prata at jalan kayu, waffles, hanging out on the beach, eating lor mee at 6am in the morning, driving down the streets at wee hours of the night blasting class 95.00. i miss my friends.

I'm just so so tired, i wana lay down and sleep and hopefully not wake up.

2007-12-13T17:29:00.000+08:00

Its been ages since my last post.
Been super duper tired. With everything, work, people around me, in general. I'm tired of life itself.

Work has taken its toil on me. Too tired to do alot of stuff nowadays. Physically tired and mentally draining. Everyday at work is like fighting a war.

On a lighter note, am changing my hp again. 3 months i've been with her, i've changed 3 hps. So on an average 1 hp a month. Amazing. Christmas is coming.... will be doing my christmas shopping soon. Had a list drawn up. I dont really feel the festive season this year. And i'll be spending xmas at work pathetic.... and i'll be going to midnight mass alone.... feeling nostalgic suddenly.

2007-11-21T02:36:00.000+08:00

After that fateful day in Aug, i now realised that yes i really did change. A part of me died that day and along with it was a big part of my confidence. I am no longer that self assured happy go lucky girl. I now plan, worry, think too much, belittle myself. I need to keep myself sane. I need to sleep. Really sleep and stop all the wierd, unhappy dreams. I need to find myself again.

2007-11-21T02:23:00.000+08:00

I'm having a bit of a confidence ego issue here. Counting down to D-Day 5 days. I'm freaking out. I'm stressed. When i'm stressed i eat. When i eat i gain kilos, which i am supposed to be on a diet but hell i'm freaking out. Damn it i need it. I need affirmation desperately. But... on the other hand, lookig at myself in the mirror, i am not sure i can make it. The thing i fear, rejection. The fear is so great that i think, why even bother trying when a part of me knows i'll never make the cut? I feel like running away, escaping. But running away means not even trying. Which brings regret. So i'll go for it... which brings back all the fear. Damn damn damn. I'm thinking too much. Now i desperately wish i'll go to sleep and wake up a thin long legged exotic beauty. Sigh. Looks does matter. It does.

2007-11-19T14:00:00.000+08:00

After 4 days of being stuck under the sweltering sun at town she is finally off tml. Why am i complaining?? coz i am stuck there with her half the time and i miss spending our quality time together.

Its been rainy lately. Cant even go for a swim in the pool. Damn. And i miss my friends sigh.

2007-11-17T16:46:00.000+08:00

I love the lyrics to this song. It gets to me everytime i hear it.

The most expensive meal

2007-11-10T16:49:00.001+08:00

We were discussing all the places we ate in and the cost of each meal.

Me: I think this is the most expensive meal we had together.

Her: No. It isnt.

Me: Really? Which other restaurant did we go to?

Her: The most expensive meal i had is when you are in the kitchen, cooking for me. That to me

is priceless.

......... You swept me off my feet...........

2007-11-10T16:28:00.000+08:00

Recieved a call yesterday afternoon....

D: Hey girl!!! I got this ang moh MALE friend.... recently got divorced. I'm gona hook the both
of you up.

Me: Huh... for what? You called the right person?

D: You know you should turn straight. Get yourself a dick. This guy is rich, good career and
handsome!! He's a good catch.

Me: Noo... not interested.

D: Aint u the least bit interested in men? I dont care if i meet up with him, you are so going.
No objections.

* she hangs up before i could say anything else.*

I fumed for abit after that phone call. I expected all that from someone else not from my "best friend" after 10 years you should know me better than that. Damn it.

I am freaking LESBIAN!!
I love women!!
To put it crudely, i love pussies. *winks*

seriously.... i dont get it. whats all the facination with men and dicks anyway? Dont tell me all the bull of being fulfilled when you have men around you. I'm fulfilled enough in more ways than one thank you. It just irritates the hell out of me.

A day out

2007-11-09T19:00:00.000+08:00

Pics of us cam whoring during our weekly outings

This is one of my favs. So cute...

2007-11-08T00:45:00.000+08:00

At my baby's place now. Just made a supper of egg mayo and tuna sandwich. I accidently put too much salt into the tuna. But she still ate it. So sweet =) *i tend to make very salty food. Sniggers*

Some probs with her younger brother again. Seeing her so upset makes me feel helpless. Sighs.

Her diners credit card just came through the mail, just as we were soooo broke. Decided to go out for a good meal plus movie tml. Since its a public holiday and she is off. She needs some comfort food right about now. Maybe i'll pop downstairs for her fav ice cream...

2007-11-04T16:37:00.000+08:00

Havent been updating coz theres's nothing to update!! lol

Changed a new hp, E250 aint too bad...nice games, she lent me her PSP and i'm playing games all day long. And i mean all day long... sniggers.
She bought me a pink octopus i saw in "More than words" super round and cute. We named it "Gong gong" super cute... its right smack in the middle of the bed staring at me now.
Her off day tml. Going to slack at home i guess, she's super tired. Poor thing.

I'm in love with munchy doughnuts! Yummy. Going to buy some down to her work place soon. Miss her cuteness, lameness and her smelly smell. Haha....crap

2007-11-01T02:11:00.000+08:00

Am tired... even though i sleep so much i still feel so very very tired. Its one of the symptoms i guess. Read it somewhere.... miss my dearie miss her snoring away beside me and i miss hugging her to bed. She misses home and i cant go over to her place coz i am going to get screwed. Sigh. Having a whooping cough. Irritating. Am going to sell off my E65 tml. Sobs... bu she de but never mind. All my messages in the phone gone.... gone!! Pouts...

I want the armani phone next year! blechz

Over You

2007-10-29T16:43:00.000+08:00

This is my current fav song. Been listening to this over and over and over. Not only i love the lyrics, his voice is sooo man!! *Drools* This is my feel good song. Lyrics are so true... so true.

Now that it's all said and done,
I can't believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down,
Like an old abandoned house.
What you said when you leftJust left me cold and out of breath.
I fell too far, was in way too deep.
Guess I let you get the best of me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

You took a hammer to these walls,
Dragged the memories down the hall,
Packed your bags and walked away.
There was nothing I could say.
And when you slammed the front door shut,
A lot of others opened up,
So did my eyes so I could see
That you never were the best for me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

2007-10-27T03:40:00.000+08:00

- Sighs -

My oh so wonderful gf pissed me off majorly today.
MAJORLY!!
But everything is fine and sweet again. =)
I got a new nickname for her... inspired by my everdearest kenny boy.
Jeanie babyyyy.... to be said in an extremely oh so sugary sweet whiney tone.
LOL
thats her new nick.

*I know you are going to kill me.

2007-10-25T02:02:00.000+08:00

Goodness... someone totally unexpected just smsed me a while back. Elina.

Spoke to her on the phone for a while and apparently she has some spinal fluid leakage to the brain and some crap. Some long word that i totally do not know how to spell. She has all the symptoms and in worst case scenrio it might lead to death, being half alive or something close to that. She said its retribution for all the bad things she has done and didnt expect that i would call her. Now i wish i didnt call nor even reply her.

..... i'm pretty shaken up. My hands are shaking.

I need my dearie now.